2020 has been...a lot to say the least. I experienced grief in ways I wasn't prepared to deal with. I sat with myself long enough to have anxiety attacks and learn to healthily process through them. I lost weight and then gained it back (plus some, chile). But you know what, my spirit is the clearest it's ever been and with that, has come appreciation for this body that's carried me through.
I've been thinking about that a lot lately, ya know. This delicate truth that our bodies have constantly experienced simultaneous trauma and joy, pain and pleasure; yet rather than focusing on what our bodies have done for us, we focus on forcing them to do and become something that doesn't serve us well. I'm committed to focusing more on taking care of every part of this vessel, rather than trying to achieve a certain version of it. This body has served me well and in 2021, I'm committed to returning the favor.
This commitment goes beyond the traditional New Year's resolutions that include working out, changing my diet -- yada yada. Because honestly, I've never been met with major change in the single moment of resolve that happens on December 31st. This time, I want the peace that comes with feeling safe in my own body (even on the days that I don't like the way it looks). The emotional clarity that comes with allowing my body to process through every feeling, on its own time. The strength that comes from moving my body regularly and resting habitually. And the joy that comes from keeping still long enough to hear God speak to me and appreciating the process of applying what I've heard.
com·mit·ted
/kəˈmidəd/
adjective
feeling dedication and loyalty to a cause, activity or job; wholeheartedly dedicated.
If you haven't already figured it out, my word for 2021 is committed!
Here are my commitments for the year:
- I am committed to finding the balance between extending grace to myself and pushing past my comfort zone, gently..but without excuses.
- I am committed to intentional financial planning.
- I am committed to extending grace and compassion in all of my relationships, starting with myself. I no longer wish to see the people that I love from lenses clouded by my own brokenness (even if they are responsible for shattering those parts of me); I am wholeheartedly dedicated to seeing them from healed lenses - lenses that I took time and care to repair for my own sake.
- I am committed to walking in forgiveness.
- I am committed to being healed and whole, not broken and damaged.
- I'm committed to my health and wellness, and will continue to show appreciation to this body that allows me to make such a commitment.
- I'm committed to showing up for myself...on time (LOL).
- And lastly, I am committed to basking in the "little moments" and the grace that meets me even in those -- because change still happens in the small moments of my daily life.
What commitments are you making in 2021?
